The New Picture

When you create an Energetic Picture it sometimes takes Time to Manifest.  Reflection and visualization combined with trial-and-error, attempts at 'pictures without energy' and of course Doubts & Fears.  My father got sick and passed away during this period and there were Pictures there with him and what he might have wanted, or what I thought that he might have wanted, etc.

But after it all, this was the Energetic Picture that I settled on in my heart and when I saw it in 'real life' I knew that I was there.  ~2 years but well worth the journey.  I see my Water and I see my Nature...and it sees Me! :)

All the Best,
Whitney
© 2017 All rights reserved, Whitney Merril

Free the Pigs

My Bureau clutter

Step 1 in my process to address 'Whassup?' is to free up energetic space for myself so that I have more space to 'maneuver' as I seek to understand what it going on.  For me, that means a physical as well as a mental & spiritual cleansing process.  In my physical space I start with the environment around me at home, work and in my community.  I like to start with the easy ones first like my bureau at home...

Book shelf maxxed

                    ...my bookshelf...

Old files for the Shredder

                                                                    ...filing cabinet...

Clothes and Shoes (Free the Piggies) for Donation

                                                                                                                 ....and wardrobe.

As I perform this physical environment cleansing, I am careful to not rush the process and to give myself the time and space to experience the energy of 'letting-go', paying careful attention to any signs of distress or resistance.  This is not an exercise to throw the 'baby out with the bathwater but a selective pruning of my environment to free up a few more inches of space on the bureau, bookshelf, file cabinet and wardrobe.

In addition to letting-go I am looking for clues along the way or perhaps something that was hidden beneath the clutter or buried under a pile.  These items I record in my journal to continue with the process of mental and spiritual review.

New Journal, starting fresh

All the Best,
Whitney
© 2015 All rights reserved, Whitney Merrill

Whassup?

Happy Fishing Boy - Pillar Point Pier, El Granda, CA

Ok, that was the correct thing to do in this situation fer sure.  Got out in Nature with my son in the present Autumn (note fog in background, Half Moon Bay style) and did some fishing.  We had a great time and caught a bunch of crabs including a pretty big rock crab that we named 'Mac Daddy'.

Also got to play with the new walkie-talkies that my wife got for us.  In our family she is affectionately and lovingly called Mai and we had a fun time calling her at home from the dock to share the news of fishing in real-time.  We had some good laughs and great fun - my son and I are still G2G (in case that was the issue here).

We caught 15 crabs and no fish but had a fun time feeding mackerel and chicken bait to the seagulls and sea lions.  That was a wonderful morning but as we returned home and I put the rods and crab net away I saw the surfcasting rods that we use for Summer fishing.  It made me think of my father in-law who brought his rod to Cape Cod from New Jersey this Summer to show my son how to surf-cast…and I found myself drifting again from the present and thinking of the Summer.  You see how this works, don't you?

Ok, so here is my process:  If I do something that I LOVE to do (you can read my many prior posts on this topic but fishing with my son in Nature is up there big-time) to ground and presence myself and it does not bring me back into balance...then I know that I have some WORK TO DO to find out 'Whassup?'  My next posts will discuss this process in detail but what I will comment on now is that I have dedicated years of my life to finding true peace, joy and energy for myself.  I treat it as a gift and also something that is earned and must be assiduously cared for - it is not arbitrarily given and if left unaided can drift away into a fog.

Bottom Line:  When the space robot gives me a warning...I am ON IT.  More to come, I am now IN ACTION. :)

All the Best,
Whitney
© 2015 All rights reserved, Whitney Merrill

Where are You?

Cape Cod - Eastham, MA at low tide

I had a really good summer.  It was the kind of summer that you never want to have end…but the sun sets on everything and it did.  Chock-full of joy and fun, cool projects and adventures at work at home and on the road with family and friends.  And now it's Autumn and already beginning to get colder and darker with the days getting shorter and shorter.  Soon it will be winter - and then it will be colder and even darker.  And we're thinking we may have El Nino in California this winter so it could be rainy, and colder and darker.

However, when I look at this picture I am instantly transported back to the warmth of the evening summer sun and can feel the water on my feet as I wade through the tide pools with my son looking for treasures in the sand.  My body is here in the Autumn going to winter but my mind and spirit are living in the past of Summer.  I am in two places at once, split in time and not really in either one.  I can feel myself not fully engaged in my Autumn and longing for what seems just a picture away…'Danger Will Robinson!!'

Source:  Lost in Space, 60's TV Show

I know that I'm dating myself here a bit from that TV show from the 60's (Lost in Space) but nothing makes an emphasis point more than a space robot so I had to go for it.  :)

The reason that the space robot alert is needed here is because getting caught in the in-between space between the present and the past is a sure-fire way to have you end up permanently in the past…which severely limits your future.  You end up moving forward in life trying to re-create or re-hash or re-work or re-omptimize or re-emphasize or re-live the past…and you never really can.  It burns up tons of energy, takes your focus away from enjoying the present and keeps you eternally frustrated and sad for what it just out of reach.

Oh sure, you can try (BTW, I'm already planning our next summer vacation in Cape Cod with my family) but it will never, never be the same last last summer.  For one thing, my son will be 8 instead of 7 and as I have found, he's growing up quick and I can barely keep up with how fast he is becoming a young man vs. a little child.  Who knows, he could be quoting me from Lost in Space next year after watching it on YouTube now that I've posted this BLOG.  It just will not be exactly the same…no matter what I do or how hard I try.

So, where does that leave me?  Do I frame the picture, put in on my desk, and look at it during every free minute at work so that it keeps me warm during the cold winter months?  I'm hearing the caution from the space robot again so I'm going to hold on that…maybe just a screensaver?  How about we go on a winter vacation to somewhere tropical…will that do the trick?  Never seems to quite do the trick but could be worth a try?

What I do know is that I must find a way to get fully back to the present…and fast.  My present is spinning past me and I'm not fully here.  My son wants to go fishing with me right now (it's 6am) and I'm here on the computer writing a BLOG vs. being with him as he grows into a young man.  Signing off now, will continue this on the next post!

All the Best,
Whitney
© 2015 All rights reserved, Whitney Merrill

Milestone Energy

Rainbow Ribbon
La Petite Baleen - Half Moon Bay, CA

 My son recently passed his first swimming level certification (a.k.a. the Rainbow Ribbon) at our local pool.  He was so proud of his achievement, especially as this was something that he had done all on his own (i.e. no help from Mommy or Daddy).  I found myself commenting out loud to him that this would be the only Rainbow Ribbon that he ever receives but he didn't quite understand that and was much more interested in where we are going next (the upcoming celebratory bowling event that we had promised him as a reward)!  :)  However, the moment stuck with me and got me to thinking more about milestones and their incredible impact on our lives.

The truth of it is that you can get only one 'Rainbow Ribbon' in your life.  It's a milestone and once you've officially earned it they can't take it back from you.  Even if you suddenly woke up one day and forgot how to swim, when you went back to swim school and had to retake the test again it wouldn't be the same...it would be the second Rainbow Ribbon and nothing like the first.  Additionally, once you get the Ribbon that you worked so hard to get the milestone tends to move by you so quickly in preparation for the next.  At swimming school when you have achieved Level 1 you are immediately faced with Level 2, and Level 3, and Level 4, etc.  As a matter of fact, in my hand I'm actually holding a Level 2 foundation skill sticker that he attained only minutes after getting to Level 1...crazy how fast life moves and how quickly we can skip over these important events if we don't even stop to take a few pics! :)

We all do this - we set goals and strive to achieve seemingly unattainable milestones like being able to swim when before it was a bit scary and intimidating...and then we 'suddenly' do it!  It takes tons of focus and determination and effort to achieve the milestone that once we get there we tend to just keep on moving.  We want to immediately jump right into the next goal or milestone, without even pausing to enjoy and savor the one we just achieved.  In the euphoric moment of 'I did It!' there is a tendency to feel light-headed, un-grounded and lose your bearings a bit...and this is where our mind will want to go right to 'Now...What Next!?'

What is so critical is to celebrate and leverage that milestone - even if just for a few seconds to stop and live in that wonderful moment.  There will always be a "What Next?" but there is a magical moment of milestone achievement right in front of us...and it is dying to be appreciated!!  It wants us to love ourselves and be proud of our accomplishment...to smile, beam and BE in the energy of 'ringing the bell'.  It is an inclusive energy with room for all and an energy that can be used for our next creation or goal or milestone...IF we are able to fully let it in and receive it's energetic support.

The process for leveraging this energy is super simple:  Do something that you really LOVE to do while thinking of your milestone achievement...that's it.  Even just a few minutes celebrating your milestone in conjunction with doing something you love will allow you to take a short break from the 'What's Next?' to focus on the Right NOW.  Jump up and down, shout from the rooftops, go hang out with your friends, have a party, give time or money to those in need, tell 10 people you love them, have you favorite meal, watch the sunset, etc.  Just do what you LOVE to do with the purpose of leveraging the energy of the milestone...and it will keep the wind in your sails on the voyage of your life.

Oh...and don't forget to celebrate with ice cream!! :)

All the Best,
Whitney
© 2014 All rights reserved, Whitney Merrill

Not Perfect

Mother's Day Shadow Box Gift
Half Moon Bay, CA Shells

My son requested that we make a shadow box gift of sand and shells for Mother's Day.  A week ago we went out to our local Maverick's beach and gathered lots of great shells, sand and natural items.  My son washed them all, picked out which ones that he wanted to include and then I got out the glue and we went at it.

To provide a bit of context, I am not the most 'craft' oriented person in the world fer sure…for me creation usually involves woodworking, carpentry or photography - small, detailed oriented projects are quite a challenge.  Think chainsaw, shop smith, backhoe…not tweezers, glue guns and threading needles.  :)

Suffice it to say my patience was wearing thin as I attempted to get this project 'done' vs. truly taking my time.  After a few near curses, exasperated sighs and perspiration beginning to drip off my nose (it was our usual Coastside summer temp of 60 degrees and we were on the garage workbench with the door open), my son looks at me with a bit of concern (for me) and says:  "Daddy, it doesn't have to be perfect."

I looked at him as I was about to respond with "Well, yes it does - it's for Mother's Day!"and I stopped and paused instead.  The mystics and wisest of us are fond of telling us that children are our greatest teachers - this was one of those great teaching moments for me…and fortunately I got it.  I responded instead with: "You're totally right…let's let it dry a bit and we'll wrap it up later.  Let's go for a bike ride instead."  BTW - thank you for the pause Universe, totally saved my day!

To be honest, we never did get a chance to wrap it up and Mother's Day came upon us and we delivered it to Mom in plastic bag (still leaking sand) - but of course she LOVED it!!  My son was sooooo proud and pleased to make a special gift to give his Mom.  He was also 100% correct in that it did not have to be Perfect…and therefore it was.  I don't quite know how to describe it other than to say that it was Perfectly Imperfect in it's own unique way.

"Happy Mother's Day Mai!"

Happy Mother's Day to all Mom's out there!  Enjoy your day and don't worry if it is Not Perfect…if you really pause and think about it you'll see that it will be, just because it IS.

All the Best,
Whitney
© 2014 All rights reserved, Whitney Merrill

The Flow

Old Town Water Fountain
Geneva, Switzerland

After periods of extreme stress, intense work or 'heads-down' focus it is common to experience a sense of Energetic depletion.  We have 'put out' more than we have 'pulled in' over time resulting in a net imbalance in the flow of energy, which ultimately drains the Energetic 'tank'.  Like a bucket with a hole in bottom - if we're not filling it up faster than it is draining at the bottom then we're going to soon have an empty bucket.

To be clear - our empty Energetic 'bucket' is not like having our car's fuel tank read Empty, an imbalance in blood-sugar, lack of sleep or even a Vitamin D deficiency…this is is something even more fundamental.  I'm talking about the the Energy that sustains us, nurtures and propels us forward.  Without it we lack the will to engage fully in life.  Without it we find ourselves running on 'fumes' and going through the motions just to get to the end of the day…and then start another day all over again on 'auto-pilot' moving forward just for the sake of moving forward.  No fun, no smiles and definitely no sense of humor…

Weary World Traveler
@ any International Airport

One of the other challenges it that there is no currently known Energetic 'gauge' or indicator light to tell us when we are depleted.  This in conjunction with the fact that the stress event or focused mode that got us into this situation does not naturally lend itself to pauses to check the gauge...fight or flight after all was developed to get us away from the danger FAST, no matter what the cost to our reserves.  It's the everyday stress and intense focus required for many routine events in our lives that is somewhat unique to our modern world.

When I find myself feeling Energetically depleted one of my methods for checking the 'gauge' is to sit by some moving body of water and focus on the Flow.  Whether it be a remote mountain stream, my son's bathtub being filled at home or the water fountain in a old cobble-stoned square, I simply sit and focus my attention on the flow of the water in and the flow of the water out.  While doing this I then picture a gauge, a scale or a thermometer of sorts in my mind and look to see what the reading is.  If it's low (as I saw on my last trip) then I know it's time to work on filling my tank, either by plugging the 'hole' at the bottom or turning up flow from the 'faucet'.

More on how to accomplish that in future posts but one of my recent personal ideas was to manifest some fresh, new, loving, joyful energy into our family home…and look at just what appeared this weekend!

Mo the Puppy
8 Weeks Young

Feeling my Energetic bucket being filled up again already! :)

All the Best,
Whitney
© 2014 All rights reserved, Whitney Merrill